February…The Month of Love
Rather than writing about things going on and what Valentine's Day means, I want to share some very important information with you for this Day of Love.
As I’m always reading information about Family Caregivers, the growing numbers, the difficulties getting help, the struggles of maintaining your own health as you care for others, I want to share a few of important things I learned. Although I was a Caregiver for my husband for twenty years, I never realized how much Family Caregiving can affect the Caregiver's health. We hear about Take Care of Yourself, but never about how Caregiving hurt your health.
I knew I was stressed, and many times felt overwhelmed by stress and lack of sleep. But then, what choice is there?
And although all of us experience stress from time to time, maybe suddenly, or a day or a week or two, I seemed to experience a steady dose of stress, interspersed with a day, maybe two non-stress days. But when someone has a long illness and they’re maintaining life and not getting better, Family Caregivers are managing their loved one's illness every day, even weekends.
I also had many nights of sleep that were interrupted repeatedly as my husband needed assistance in the middle of the night. Years of interrupted sleep.
I'm not telling you something you don't know. If you are a Family Caregiver, you know exactly what I'm talking about. And Family Caregivers aren't the only ones that experience sleepless nights; New parents, Military, Medical personnel, and there may be others. My point is, Family Caregivers are usually the sole Caregiver for their loved one. They may be in their third, fifth, fifteenth year of providing care, and they are usually providing care by themselves.
As I was getting ready for this year’s Medicare (5 minute checkup) doctor visit, I came across an article in LinkedIn by a woman named Vika Gallich, and Facebook, She has studied the brain and wrote an informative article about what she's discovered How Stress Affects the Brain….and the heart….and health.
When I was reading her article, I thought she was talking about me, about Family Caregivers. And I remembered my doctor visit the year before and getting a gentle lecture about my "High Blood Pressure" and "Borderline LDL" and felt guilty as I thought despite Caregiving, I ate healthy, exercised, meditated when I could, and felt OK despite the stress and sleeplessness. My doctor never mentioned the effects Family Caregiving may have had or will have on my health.
I also have been following a Physician Executive, Cardiologist, Jonathan Fisher, on Linked in who talks at length about the heart but also about how stress affects the heart and how meditation and stress management can help. He also has a book "Just One Heart."
https://www.drjonathanfisher.com/
So this year when I had my blood test and still have borderline LDL, although all my other numbers are excellent, I mentioned to my doctor about my 20 years of Caregiving and the doctor never seemed to take that into consideration when doing my yearly visit, instead talking diet, and recently suggesting Statins until I shared the information I had from the above two folks, and how stress releases chemicals into your system that can cause heart problems. Yeah, I know just what you wanted to hear.
And I didn't either, but an important point to take into consideration and to talk to your doctor about since doctors, and nurses never seem to mention how the chronic stress of Caregiving can affect your health. I even took a copy of Vika’s list of how the brain deals with stress and gave it to my doctor so she can be aware and help other Family Caregivers become aware of why it is so important to Take Care of Yourself.
In his recent post, Dr. Fisher mentioned Chronic Stress and Loneliness which I believe seem go hand and hand with Family Caregiving.
So, give yourself a Valentine's Day checkup, and check out those articles (yes, I know, more work) and become Intentional in Taking Care of Yourself. And if you need an idea on how to; check out my book Coming Home to Yourself, Care for the Caregivers. Or email me with your questions? I’m here for you.
Sending love, tender heart care, and a link to my favorite Meditation Teacher….
Davidji, his website: https://davidji.com/, also on Insight Timer.
Amy
NOTE: The links above for V. Gillach, Dr. Fisher, and Davidji are my recommendations of folks whose insight helped me understand stress, as well as understanding how the stress of Caregiving can relate to health. I have never met these people other than online, and do not receive any income from placing their links in my post.